This is going to be a giant bitch-fest, so if you’re not in the mood for that right now, keep scrolling. You can come back to it when you need some fuel.
My mom is in memory care (which you know if you’ve read any of my previous blog posts). She’s been at Cedar Ridge since 2017. She’s toward the end-stages of Alzheimer’s. Her brain is Swiss cheese. She’s in a wheelchair, non-verbal, and I don’t even remember when the last time was when I felt like she might have - just maybe - recognized me. She’s agitated, and she audibly grinds her teeth - it’s like nails on a chalkboard. On the one hand, I grieved her a long time ago. On the other hand, it’s agonizing, because I know she would be mortified at the state she’s “living” in. Yeah - it’s not living. She’s a shell of a human, and I still fail to understand how we treat our pets with more empathy & compassion than we do our people. I’ve said this to people and get horrified looks in return, but I’m going to put it on the page: if I could have gotten away with smothering her with a pillow, I would have done it years ago. Let me be clear - I don’t wish my mom dead. I wish her peace. And if you’re full of righteous indignation at that, #comeatmebro.
I’ve been in real estate for nearly 20 years. In Texas, if you raise a tenant’s rent over 5% of one month’s rent, you have to give them a 60-day notice. I got an email on December 1st saying they mailed letters that there will be an increase effective January 1st. It did not give any indication of what the increase would be, which is not “notice delivered”. I emailed the director to ask, because I’ll have to transfer funds. She responded that they’re raising her rent by $555 - $5610 to $6165. Per month. Over a 10% increase. That’s what memory care costs. Let that sink in. Here’s my email to the director:
“FOR WHAT!? The last two times I’ve been there, she’s been in bed with her pants around her thighs, or she’s been sitting in soaking wet pants. You absolutely cannot tell me that this increase is a result of the “care” she’s getting.
Corrie, I do not want to move her, but a $555 increase is outrageous given what I’ve witnessed recently. I absolutely will not pay that.
Let me know if we need to meet or if I need to talk to someone in corporate management.”
I don’t know what will happen, but I’m sad, frustrated, and angry. This is a HUMAN. SHE IS MY MOM. I want to scream. I want to break things. But mostly, I just want her to be at peace.
